Sunday, December 26, 2010

SINKERS

I said, 'Who's that woman coming this way?' and he said, 'I don't know who she is but I'm going to kill her' and then he makes little boats with his eyes all lashed up-like and to a dock and they're floating on dark water, just bobbing up and down, waiting for more water; just little boats making war, making traffic with the earth, filling up the world's ears with their mournful sounds, and really intending it. Intending on killing this woman walking toward us under the bridge and away from the men at the waterfront. We sink into the stone of the bridge like we've learned to sink into the stone of things before, placing our backs deeper and deeper into shadow, waiting for our shadows to fumble over each other. Then, in my head, the structure of the thing sinking into a lake and the material of it crumbling down to where we put our backs down into a deeper darker wall but made of mud and of the very bottom.

Saturday, December 25, 2010

FOR ISRAEL :: LOVE TEAL

We were born this way, into a hundred years of a house, that kind of legacy, which sticks to yr skin as with soft water & as with signs of aging. In the old days, things were carved out of stone to remember the being hard -- to remember how it is to be a solid form. Before birth, even conception, there is a frenzied state of solidity. It is so solid that there are no questions about it. Solid. However, the house fits in. It's perfect: all that needs to preface that is this:

"Every dream is a solid trust." And it looks like this:

"Four walls, ceilings tall, windows and doors, always the floor... and the head: The head of the house."

Reach out to your corners and sift the collected dust there. Who's skin cells mingle with what flavor & tobacco? But, with all due respect, let's remember the rowdy clans of dust until tossing them, finally to the water.

Friday, December 24, 2010

A BEATLE'S CHRISTMAS

Hello, this is Ringo Starr wishing a very deep and happy and ultimately fulfilling Christmas to everyone in the entire world, on the entire planet, no one excluded and I really mean that. I want to, for the first time, say a thing that I really mean to all of humans, not as a Beatle or as a celebrity but as just another little person who is understanding a little more every day and trying, really trying, to just be here and love people and take care of them. I want really to get past all the bullshit of who I am and what you think I've done and I want to tell you that I really truly hope you have good and happy holidays full of joy. And that if you drink, then get drunk and if you pray, then keep praying. And if you are just at home by yourself in your room sitting on your bed and looking at your hands feeling stupid, I want to tell you that there is someone trying to make peace for you in the world and that that peace is for everyone and that 'everyone' includes you and that it includes me. And everything I have ever written touches nothing and has never even come close to really saying what the thing of the matter is, what the truth of it is, and the truth of the matter is who gives a shit about Christmas? And that it's not about Christmas right now, this thing that I am doing. Wishing good wishes isn't for Christmas or for Christians or for America and it's not for feeling better at the place that you are staying at right now. It's not about days that are holy or vacation time or academia or fuck--I mean jesus, in my twenties I was absolutely convinced that I had it all figured out. I actually thought I knew exactly how the world worked and I knew what religion was and where it came from and I knew about the vastness and about the world and about what was important and I knew exactly what needed to happen and I was just so fucking sure of it and I would drink a lot of wine and scream and live like shit. But after so many years, just years and years, of getting knocked on your ass and looking around at all the people walking around above you and just knowing that goddammit, this can't be it. This can't be all of it. And you just fucking, okay fuck, I'm so drunk right now, okay.... I guess what I mean is that everyone eventually figures out that you will only arrive at the same conclusion for the rest of your life: that you don't really know anything, that you never really knew, that you had no idea what was going on and that everything you've left is only a embarrassing testament to that and so just fucking keep going, keep leaving things behind, don't try to worry about it, don't try to change anything, just understand that, that we are all okay and just that's it, there's really nothing more so fucking merry whatever to you, bless yourself, bless your friends, and fuck--go get laid or something.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

FRUIT HAMMOCK

I want to make a sound like ......mmm.....mmmm.....mmmmm

I want to fill the void with the sound......mmm.....mmmm.....mmmmm

Together rock and ice make up a comet and yes, okay, I want to make up a comet of ......mmm.....mmmm.....mmmmm

My head is falling in, there is a soft spot here. Lifted in hammocks filled with fruit and pushing it makes a banana sound. The banana sound is something like a small planet breaking. The planet is stupid. I don't understand.

I am snowing the layers of head. I am breaking apart my head. I am spilling out ice and water. I blow the water into snow, send it out on waves. The waves spill out like serpents made up of ......mmm.....mmmm.....mmmmm. Filling up the void.

I am a golden symbol floating up in weak air. I am a banana falling apart in slow motion. I have descended before the apostle. The comet is the coming of the Lord. I follow the trail of ......mmm.....mmmm.....mmmmm. A turning of water. The breaking apart of the void. The apostle standing at the edege of the water of the waves of the ......mmm.....mmmm.....mmmmm.