sexistential crisis
hello
hello
you don't feel so 'long lost' now that you have the internet
ha, the power of the internet
it validates our friendship
true, wise words
yes.
what are you doing
oh.
ok
i am sitting in a cafe
very hip
today i was washing a bowl with the hand spray and i suddenly had the impulse to shoot water into the bowl and have it slam back into my face and then open my mouth and have the water drip onto my tongue
i laughed for a very long time thinking about this
did you actually do it, or just think about it
well i am still trying to maintain some grasp of power here since i'm new and all
i didn't think it would help me toward fulfilling my 'agenda'
what agenda do you have?
the agenda to have power
sometimes i think about these kinds of things
you would
i do
yesterday i crushed a mandarin with my bare hand and i watched the juices drip down my hand onto the floor and i closed my eyes and imagined the mandarin crying for mercy
today I took a kittens tail and gripped the bony structure and hoisted the purring creature high into the air to hear it cry and see it shake.
you bent its tail?
no silly
kay good, cuz that would be fucking cruel and i would have to rip your out ovaries with my canines and have the ends of your fallopian tubes flop around in my mouth as i sniff things haunched on all fours with blood on my snout
your gross
hey, you're the cat mutilator
Right now I am looking at rooms for rent, everything is so fucking expensive. I will probably have to sell one of my eggs, after you rip out my ovaries of course.
But seriously, I can get like 5 grand for selling one of those diamonds. You could probably only get 5 bucks for jacking off into a plastic cup using your hand and a sticky magazine
no because i will swallow them and think of all your potential children with your DNA i am breeding inside of my colon and when i poop i will call each poop by name and cry for them quietly in the dark. i don't believe in masturbation, it's a sin against the body
I am pretty sure my body likes it when I stick a vibrating purple rod to myself
when i cum in my hand, my jizz forms a face and it says 'kneel and pray, motherfucker! KNEEL AND PRAY!"
so i generally classify that as a 'sin'
even though your cum is saying that, I bet your penis is saying givamee some more bitch
my penis is usually not around when i masturbate, it is standing in a corner with its arms crossed
that is weird, you must have a really long penis
no my penis knows trick photography it knows how to edit in double exposure, so it gets up and leaves while experiencing existential despair of my hand viciously beating it
5:55 pm
....
don't leave me, do not fucking leave me, i will hate you and write you name on papers over and over thinking to myself 'i will kill this person because she left me once when i was talking to her on the internet, that bitch' and i will mail these papers to myself so that everyday i can remember to write a new letter saying how i hate you and how i will kill you completely and absolutely
hello
you don't feel so 'long lost' now that you have the internet
ha, the power of the internet
it validates our friendship
true, wise words
yes.
what are you doing
oh.
ok
i am sitting in a cafe
very hip
today i was washing a bowl with the hand spray and i suddenly had the impulse to shoot water into the bowl and have it slam back into my face and then open my mouth and have the water drip onto my tongue
i laughed for a very long time thinking about this
did you actually do it, or just think about it
well i am still trying to maintain some grasp of power here since i'm new and all
i didn't think it would help me toward fulfilling my 'agenda'
what agenda do you have?
the agenda to have power
sometimes i think about these kinds of things
you would
i do
yesterday i crushed a mandarin with my bare hand and i watched the juices drip down my hand onto the floor and i closed my eyes and imagined the mandarin crying for mercy
today I took a kittens tail and gripped the bony structure and hoisted the purring creature high into the air to hear it cry and see it shake.
you bent its tail?
no silly
kay good, cuz that would be fucking cruel and i would have to rip your out ovaries with my canines and have the ends of your fallopian tubes flop around in my mouth as i sniff things haunched on all fours with blood on my snout
your gross
hey, you're the cat mutilator
Right now I am looking at rooms for rent, everything is so fucking expensive. I will probably have to sell one of my eggs, after you rip out my ovaries of course.
But seriously, I can get like 5 grand for selling one of those diamonds. You could probably only get 5 bucks for jacking off into a plastic cup using your hand and a sticky magazine
no because i will swallow them and think of all your potential children with your DNA i am breeding inside of my colon and when i poop i will call each poop by name and cry for them quietly in the dark. i don't believe in masturbation, it's a sin against the body
I am pretty sure my body likes it when I stick a vibrating purple rod to myself
when i cum in my hand, my jizz forms a face and it says 'kneel and pray, motherfucker! KNEEL AND PRAY!"
so i generally classify that as a 'sin'
even though your cum is saying that, I bet your penis is saying givamee some more bitch
my penis is usually not around when i masturbate, it is standing in a corner with its arms crossed
that is weird, you must have a really long penis
no my penis knows trick photography it knows how to edit in double exposure, so it gets up and leaves while experiencing existential despair of my hand viciously beating it
5:55 pm
....
don't leave me, do not fucking leave me, i will hate you and write you name on papers over and over thinking to myself 'i will kill this person because she left me once when i was talking to her on the internet, that bitch' and i will mail these papers to myself so that everyday i can remember to write a new letter saying how i hate you and how i will kill you completely and absolutely
posted by wagner israel cilio iii @ 3:59 PM
2 Comments:
Is this the real life
Is this just fantasy
Caught in a landslide
No escape from reality
my word verification was "terytob"
penises standing in the corner during masturbatory exercises! penis trick photography! amazing. i'm overwhelmed. and i giggled out loud. gol.
Post a Comment
<< Home